Sunday, September 16, 2012

Cry out

I cry, I don't know what to do,

These emotions overwhelm me,

There so real and in my face,

 

These wounds that afflicted me,

Cause me deep deep sorrows,

which I cannot comprehend,

I cannot understand,

How so much they affect me,

 

Try as I may to block it,

To go around it,

Trying to avoide it,

To smile and forget it,

To patch it up and sew it together again,

 

But it burns within my heart,

And any situation that effects it,

That touches on it,

My heart becomes sensitive,

And the hurts come pouring out again,

 

So emotional,

I have become the one thing I dispise,

Being the emotional person,

Why can't I stop this bleeding heart?

Why won't the sewing patch it up?

Why does it errupt and weird feelings arise,

Why am I being the thing I dispise?

 

I cut my self to let it bleed,

Hide it so that no one sees,

Try to think of the comfort of death,

Not having to face the cruel world again,

 

I am just a nice guy,

I am just someone who wants to smile,

In fact I just want to see you smile,

I just want to think everyone is good,

That evil is a thought so far away,

That everything in the land is good,

 

Wasn't I brought up to think this way?

So furious with myself that with one kind word from a stranger,

I can easily sway,

I am fooled with the foolish lies,

Which I perceived as love and kindness in my eyes,

 

This is getting too long to read,

The more I say the more I weep,

the right turn is wrong, so is the left,

Cross roads of this life to take,

It's easy to choose just death.